最后的蝴蝶——原文+翻译

07-07-12

Permalink 09:44:55, 分类: 写着玩儿

最后的蝴蝶——原文+翻译

下面这篇散文,是我今年四月到六月间在西门菲沙大学读翻译短期班时完成的作业。这个翻译短期班并没有教授太多的翻译技巧,只不过经过12个晚上的上课,我明白翻译本无技巧可言,正如学好英语并无捷径可循一样。如果硬要举出学习英语或做好翻译的一二“诀窍”,多听多读多看多说多写多练多用脑多实践才是扎实稳妥的基本法则。人的一生,工作学习安身立命做人做事大抵不出这一法则。
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The Last Butterfly

Sometimes beauty comes to meet you

By Michael Welzenbach



最后的蝴蝶

有时美丽会与你不期而遇

——Michael Welzenbach



I was 11, and my family was preparing to leave the beautiful Japanese island of Okinawa, where we had lived for four years. Shortly we’d head back to North America, thence to

England: My father was being transferred yet again.

那年我十一岁,我们家准备离开已经居住四年的美丽的日本冲绳岛。不久我们将回到北美,再搬到英格兰,因为我父亲再次调动了工作。

But I had constructed a mental wall against this unsettledness. My fascination with nature, in whatever country I moved to, provided me with an endless source of distraction and amazement. I’d been collecting seashells and fossils, hiking and bird-watching since I could remember. And when I had arrived on this little island in the Pacific Ocean , I discovered a startling variety of butterflies, and I began to collect them.

但是对这种不固定居住的生活我已有足够的心理准备。我对大自然的痴心向往,无论搬到哪个国家居住,都能提供给我充满欢乐和惊喜的无尽源泉。打我刚记事时起,我就开始收集海贝壳和化石,热衷于徒步旅行及观察野生鸟类。当我来到位于太平洋的这个小小岛屿时,我发现这儿有着各种各样令人吃惊的蝴蝶,于是我开始收集蝴蝶。

By now I had several glass-topped trays of glorious specimens, carefully labeled and mounted. They came in all sizes and hues, from deepest blues to brilliant yellows, scarlets and shimmering emerald greens. Catching butterflies wasn’t easy, so I was proud of my collection.

目前我有了几个罩着玻璃盖的浅碟(点评: “浅碟”一词用法不妥,可改为“标本盒”),里面装着辉煌多姿的蝴蝶标本,被我小心翼翼地贴了标签并装裱好。这些标本收罗了尺寸不一、色彩各异的蝴蝶,从最深的蓝色到明亮的黄色,还有鲜艳的猩红色和闪着微光的翠绿色。捕捉蝴蝶不是一件容易的事,所以我对自己的收藏颇为自豪。

But there was one that I had yet to capture – the magnificent great orange tip. The previous Christmas I had received from my godfather a marvelous book on subtropical butterflies. It included a fully illustrated page with scientific information on this orange-tipped white that, with its seven- to ten-centimetre wingspan, was Okinawa’s largest white. I was entranced – and determined to have one.

但是有一种蝴蝶我尚未捕获到,那是华贵硕大的橙色尖翅粉蝶。有个圣诞节我的教父送给我一本描写亚热带蝴蝶的奇书,书里面用整整一页带插图的科学资料介绍这种白色的橙色尖翅粉蝶,其翼展有七至十公分,是冲绳岛最大的白色蝴蝶。我深深地陶醉了,下决心拥有一只这样的蝴蝶。

The problem was its lofty habitat: I could only watch these lovely insects floating gracefully on the sea breeze, high above the canopy of trees that shrouded the centre of the island. No matter how high I climbed, encumbered by my net and collection jars, these creatures were always just beyond my reach-like white and orange confetti settled on the treetops.

问题在于这种蝴蝶喜欢栖息在高处的生活习惯:我只能观赏到这些可爱的昆虫在海风中优雅地飘舞,在遮蔽着小岛中心的树林顶上高高地飞翔。无论我爬得多高,我的捕蝶网和收藏瓶仍够不着它们,这些生物总是栖息在刚刚超过我能碰到的高度上,就象白色和橙色的五彩纸片一样高踞在树梢(点评:“树梢”应改成“树冠”,下同)上。

As the bags and boxes were packed that summer for our departure, the household was steadily converted into luggage, and our bungalow rang hollow. Yet I kept my butterfly net clear of the packers’ hands and spent most of my time outdoors, ranging through the bamboo.

那个夏天我们将要启程了,行囊箱笼都在打包,一家人井然有序地收拾着行李,我们居住的平房渐渐空旷了。然而我从打包工人的手中夺过捕蝶网,将大部分时间耗在户外,在竹林里广泛地搜寻着。

With school out for the summer and only a couple of days before we were to leave, I began to give up hope of finding my great orange tip. My mother told me one morning that my collection panels and books had to be packed up by afternoon. Meanwhile I was at leave to wander the bush and the hedgerows, keeping a wary eye out for my elusive beauty.

学校正在放暑假,再有几天我们也要离开了,我开始对找到硕大的橙色尖翅粉蝶不抱希望。某天早晨妈妈告诉我,当天下午打包我的收藏板和书籍。那时我离开家徜徉在矮树和灌木林中,仍用机警的目光搜寻着我那难以忘怀的美丽蝴蝶。

In the dense heat, the cicadas buzzed and green lizards danced on the sidewalks in the burning sun. The seas of sugarcane rippled gently in the air, and butterflies of all sorts floated or dodged briskly above the wildflowers on the hillsides. But as usual, the great orange tips remained high above the treetops that day. I traipsed home disconsolately after my fruitless, final search.

在密不透风的热浪中,知了高声地鸣叫着;在烈日下的道路旁,绿蜥蜴翩翩起舞。如海洋般宽广的甘蔗林在空中微微泛着涟漪,各种类型的蝴蝶在山坡上的野花丛中生机盎然地飞舞躲藏。与往常一样,硕大的橙色尖翅粉蝶整日停留在高高的树梢上。最后一次没什么指望的搜寻之后,我郁郁寡欢地拖曳着步子回家。

But then, as I rounded the corner of our cul-de-sac, alongside the vibrant hibiscus hedge, I caught a flash of brilliant white out of the corner of my eye. I looked up and there it was, about a metre away, settled o one of the big scarlet flowers. As it fed on the nectar, its wings moved tremulously and I froze in my tracks, transfixed. After a long moment, I began to raise my net, little by little, my heart pounding, the sweat trickling down my brow.

然而就在那时,当我走到路近头的拐角处时,在轻轻颤动的芙蓉树篱旁,一道绚丽的白光掠过我的眼角。我抬头一看,那只美丽的蝴蝶,距我大约只有一米之遥,驻足在一朵巨大的猩红色花上。它吮吸着花蜜,双翅颤抖地扇动着,我僵在路上,呆呆地望着。过了好一阵子,我开始举起捕蝶网,一点一点地靠近它,我的心砰砰直跳,汗水顺着眉毛慢慢流下来。

Suddenly the big beauty was aloft, moving to another flower. I swung. And there at last was the coveted prize, beating furiously in the fine mesh of my trap. I could scarcely believe my eyes or my luck.

突然这只美丽的大蝴蝶飞向高处,停在了另一朵花上。我转过身来,最后就像中了大彩一样,在完美的一扑中蝴蝶落入捕蝶网内猛烈地踢打着(点评:本想把“踢打”改成“扑腾”,但因前面已用了一个“扑” 字,故未改)。我简直不敢相信自己的眼睛,或者说是不敢相信自己竟有如此好运。

Gently I reached in and grabbed the butterfly by the thorax, with every intention of nudging it into the killing jar, where the deadly formaldehyde would quickly do its work. But my hand froze as I reached for the jar, and I simply gazed, astonished, at the grail in my other hand. There was the brilliant, iridescent bloom of orange on the tips of its glowing white wings, and I could feel the creature’s fear between my fingers. Its little legs scrambled frantically in my palm.

我轻轻地伸出手,捏着蝴蝶的腹部,再慢慢地把它塞进杀虫瓶,瓶里致命的福尔马林药液很快就会把它制成标本。然而触摸到杀虫瓶时我的手却停了下来,我简直惊呆了,痴痴地凝视着另一只手里捕获的圣品。蝴蝶生机勃勃的白色双翼顶端点缀着如彩虹般绚丽的橙色花纹,我能感觉到手指之间小生物的恐惧。蝴蝶小小的腿部在我手掌里疯狂地抓爬着。

And then, on an impulse, I tossed my long-sought prize into the clear, bright air and watched it float away like a perfect, living origami. High above the nearby trees it sailed, then disappeared from sight.

那时,我突然有种冲动,将自己长期以来苦苦追寻的战利品抛向了清澈晴朗的天空,看着它象完美的生动的千纸鹤一般飞远了。蝴蝶先是翻飞在附近的树林之上,然后就从我的视线中消失了。

Two days later I, too, was soaring over the little green island, headed for a home I didn’t know. My butterfly was down there somewhere, hovering above the trees, distant and only fleetingly attainable.

两天后我也翱翔在这个绿色小岛的上方,飞向我不知道的家园。我的蝴蝶就停留在飞机下的某个地方,盘旋在树梢上。它是那么遥不可及,仅仅在我手中短暂地轻轻划过。

Love is like that.

爱亦如是。



Michael Welzenbach died in December 2001, at the age of 48. After eight years, “The Last butterfly” is Michael’s 27th and final story for Reader’s digest.

迈克尔·威占巴赫卒于2001年12月,享年48岁。八年之后,《最后的蝴蝶》成为迈克尔第27篇也是最后一篇被《读者文摘》收录的故事。(点评:这里有点语焉不详。八年之后,指的是迈克尔完稿后的八年还是去世后的八年?从时间上来看,不可能是他去世后的八年,但这篇散文何时完稿,文中并未说明。)

Michael lived a marvelously rich and varied life that took him all over the world. He was an artist and an art critic, a musician, a poet and a novelist, and he cared passionately about beauty and about truth. He wanted his work to make a difference, and it did. Ask the missionary priest in Ecuador whose struggle on behalf of the poor Michael brought to light or the Newfoundland woman whose murdered daughter’s killer he helped bring to justice.

迈克尔过着富裕且多样化的生活,使得他游历了全世界。他是一位画家和艺术评论家,音乐家,诗人及小说家,充满热情地关注着美好的事物和真理。他希望自己的作品与众不同,并且他真的做到了不同凡响。问一问厄瓜多尔那位代表穷人进行争斗的传教牧师,就能知道迈克尔怎样给他带来了光明;或者问一问纽芬兰那位女儿被人谋杀的妇女,就能知道迈克尔怎样帮助她将杀人凶手送上了审判庭。

Michael was a good man, and he will be missed. He already is.

迈克尔是一个好人,人们将永远怀念他。他已经永记于人们的心中。

----Murray Lewis, Editor-in-chief

----默里 刘易斯,总编辑 (点评:又来一个语焉不详。默里是哪家报社、杂志社、出版社的总编?许是《读者文摘》总编?)

点评:再多说两句。如果非英语专业的人士想要学习英译中、中译英笔译口译技巧,上这个班没太大意义。至于如何才是行之有效的方法来提高笔译口译水平,窃以为除了坚持不懈地练习之外,别无他途。
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翻譯有技巧。你說那個翻譯短期班沒有教“太多的”翻譯技巧,這就等於承認,翻譯有技巧。

翻譯是信息在兩種語言之間的轉換,而技巧就是講究如何轉換,至於信息有沒有在轉換中走樣,那就是譯得貼切不貼切的問題了。有的人中英文都很好,對東方文化和西方文化也熟悉,但就是不會中譯英或英譯中,原因在於不懂翻譯技巧。

要掌握一種語言不容易,要掌握兩種語言更不容易,要掌握兩種語言之間的轉換,那可說是極不容易,不能不像你說的那樣--多實踐。多實踐,可以多練習從別人那裡學來的技巧,也可以從自己的成敗中悟得技巧。

我覺得,翻譯涉及語言,也涉及文化。若要從事翻譯,在語言方面就要對詞語十分敏感,要分辨詞語之間的微妙差別,在文化方面就要認真體察,還要預料譯文讀者的感覺、聯想和反應。

你的譯文已很好,多實踐就會把技巧運用得如臂使指。但實踐辛苦,一般的人不會自討苦吃,所以掌握不了技巧。種瓜得瓜,種豆得豆,像我這樣動口不動手,自然不會有收穫。這也公平。
07-07-12 @ 12:19
翻译的最高境界就是······

















啥也不翻!哼!!!


我说呢水晶阿姨咋就失踪了涅,原来是读书去咧。毕业了,也接受一下我的祝贺吧!
07-07-12 @ 15:25
看来你和容若是同学咧:

http://www.mmmca.com/blog_u2036/p/24792.html
07-07-12 @ 17:21
评论源自: 水晶阿姨 · http://www.crystalvan.com
回晓临:翻译是一门需要下苦功的技术,看来这条路俺也只能业余玩玩。

回逸老汉:这个书读得挺没意思的,没动笔写点啥的原因是没啥可写的。哪儿能象老汉呀,下笔就来。。。

回王老糊:容若也读了这个课?难怪当时她劝我不必去读,原来也没太大收获。。。
07-07-12 @ 21:24
回水晶:你去读书了,可能有所不知。在你埋头读书的时候,我们这里一个假老头被贴出了照片,不要太帅哦,据我朋友说,假老汉网上一亮相,迷倒一批MM,两批JJ,三批师奶。
07-07-12 @ 23:28
评论源自: 子午
这个不懂D说:p

加西村民中有“一腚”水平的人当推:温哥华失眠夜!
07-07-13 @ 03:53
评论源自: 麦子谷子 · http://mmmca.com/blog_ann/index.html
读书好啊,水晶真是勤奋。

07-07-13 @ 10:20
评论源自: 麦子谷子 · http://mmmca.com/blog_ann/index.html
感动于这样不期而遇的美丽和伤感。
07-07-13 @ 10:26
评论源自: 水晶阿姨 · http://www.crystalvan.com
回ingrid:假老头的照片俺还是敬仰了滴,堪称经典。。。

回子午:睡不着老兄是大师级的,俺只能归入涂鸦类。。。

回麦子:取笑不是?什么勤奋呀,俺现在有的只剩下时间了。。。
07-07-13 @ 20:57
评论源自: 易中行 · http://seeways.blogchina.com/
嘿嘿!有意思!翻译技巧!做事技巧!为人技巧!一切的一切的技巧,一的一切的技巧!嘿嘿!也许,原本就不是技巧!点推!
07-07-14 @ 00:17
评论源自: 铅笔
凑热闹~~~顺便学习一下水晶的翻译~~~~
07-07-14 @ 22:20
评论源自: 清清小河
译得好啊!能干的水晶阿姨.欣赏!学习!
07-09-09 @ 22:50

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